Circle Time

Santa Claus, Saint Nicholas, and Family with Colin and Yolanda

December 21, 2022 Colin Page McGinnis Season 3 Episode 2
Circle Time
Santa Claus, Saint Nicholas, and Family with Colin and Yolanda
Show Notes Transcript

In this episode of Circle Time, Colin and Yolanda explore the topic of discussing Santa Claus with young children and navigating holiday traditions with extended family. As parents and early childhood educators, they know firsthand the importance of being thoughtful and intentional about how we introduce holiday traditions to young children, and how to navigate the complexities of celebrating with loved ones from different backgrounds and perspectives.

Join us as we discuss Yolanda's family's tradition of honoring Saint Nicholas, and how to approach discussions about Santa Claus with honesty and sensitivity to wanting to tell the truth.

Whether you're a new parent, an experienced educator, or somewhere in between, this episode of Circle Time has something for everyone as we dive deep into all things little over the first five years. We hope that our discussion made the first five years just a little easier. Be sure to check the show notes for additional tips and tricks, and subscribe to Circle Time on Spotify, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Circle Time is a product of SproutFive, a nonprofit that since 1922 has been working to reimagine early education. You can learn more about our work at sproutfive.org

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Colin:

Welcome to Circle Time, a podcast or we dive deep into all things little over the first five years, exploring the joys and challenges of parenting and early education. Each week, host Colin and Yolanda will bring you insights and advice from experts in the field, as well as stories and tips from parents just like you. Whether you're a new parent and experienced educator, or somewhere in between, you'll find something of value in each of these discussions. Tune in and let's gather round for Circle Time. Hey Yolanda.

Yolanda:

Hey, Collin.

Colin:

So I want to pick up a conversation that I actually had with my husband last night. When we were out for dinner and it has to do with the holidays. So a little bit of a. Contacts and backstory and bring folks up to date. I, by the holidays, my family will become a family of three or four, depending on how the foster and adoption process works. which we're really excited about. Yeah. I'm super excited. All the things that I thought I was prepared for. I'm not, an I am, and that's a whole nother conversation. We'll do. in a different day. But as we are, decking the halls and putting up the Christmas lights and everything else. Trying to prepare for the reduction in time that we would have over the next couple of weeks traditionally, when we would do these things. I've been thinking a lot about the holidays and. Little kids And kiddos, particularly around G to. And the conversation we were having last night. Was around, how do we want to handle Santa? Like, how do we want. Santo to function. And I thought I knew exactly what Chris was going to say. I thought we were going to do the whole Santa brings you know, Books and maybe movie in an outfit and then, you know, dad and Bob are going to bring the toys or the bigger gifts and everything else. but that's not how the conversation went. Before we jump too far in though. I want to play something I saw in tech talk that could maybe spur our conversation a little bit. Okay. All right. And maybe you've seen this, but I'm assuming not because it just popped up on mine. So I'm going to hit play here. We'll hopefully patch in the audio. For the episode itself, but then we can just jump right in. Cause I'm super interested on how you all handle Christmas.

Yolanda:

Okay.

Colin:

So that was from an account called Amanda talks a lot. And I was really, there are a lot of really interesting things that, that one minute covers the idea of adoptive family, which we even do here at sprout five. This idea of how then do you tie kids into philanthropy and giving, which is super interesting. But then this idea of how we approach Sante and naughty and nice and how that impacts like orality and the development of morals. But before we dive all in to that, I'm super curious. How do you handle if you do at all the concept of Santa's in your house.

Yolanda:

So it was something that was really difficult for me and my husband. At first, I had this whole idea. Because for me, I'm at. I'm led so much by logic. And I also understand the importance of imagination. and. And fantasy and make believe in all of these things. And initially my conversation was. I don't want to be a liar. to my child. Yeah, that was the biggest thing for me. I was like, I can't. If my child comes to me and asks me a question, I'm going to give them an answer. And Even if that question is whether or not. Santa exists, I can't I don't want to be the person who perpetuates that lie for them. Yeah. Mainly in that they're going to find out. Somewhere along the line. That Santa is not a real individual. And then they're going to be angry at me and have this space where they're like, I don't trust you because you lied to me. You had me thinking for years? that this. This. That guy breaks into her house. And drops off gifts. But, and that was actually part of the reason why we had the conversation. Cause my daughter was actually freaked out about the idea of someone else being in our house. Even if they were leaving gifts, she was like, why is this person in our house? Right.

Colin:

So I'll let you keep going. But the other thing is it's a multi-year lie. And It is like it's some, it's something that. and. Maybe this is where your conversation's going. But where I was thinking is okay, I don't want to lie to my kid. This is a multi-year thing that I have to commit to. Which is fine. We'll do it. That's cool. But then at one point, and how do you tell them and what I think. My finding out Santa wasn't real story is super interesting because I was watching all the kids next door. They had four of them at the time. My brother would be around two. There was like five. Littler kids. I think I was in Early middle school and the mom of the family that I was watching the kids for said, Hey, I know, you know, Santa is not real, but don't, let's not spoil it for them kind of thing, blah, blah. I knew, but I'm like I never had this conversation. So then there's also not this hard and fast. Moment of truth. Like when do we all collectively decide which I think compounds. the other worry that I have, which is. I don't want to ruin Santo. For other parents, kids, like I don't want to ruin it for another family. So then how do you balance that flip side in, because like your four year old is going to go to the preschool and talk about Santa, because we over carry the Christmas curriculum, which we'll talk about in a little bit. But how do you navigate that? Because I think I'm tracking with you right now, but I have a feeling you're probably going to end up where we ended up. In terms of how we handle the holidays, but keep going.

Yolanda:

It was, it's really tough. Having a young person in preschool also. So my seven year old. and one of the concepts. So my seven year old was the first one who asked about it, and I think she might have been about five years old. when she asked me. And again, in that space of not wanting to take away the magic of you go to sleep, you wake up their gifts, their. So, what we had a conversation about was the concept of Santa and how it was based on a real story. And so that's what we talked about. And so I introduced the idea of a person that does exist. That is a real person in that Saint Nicholas. And so we had conversations about St. Nicholas being from Turkey. So he had skin that looked like hers. Right. He had, You know, he had browner skin and he was from Turkey and he was a real person and he was very giving and he, you know, and I told her the story of Saint Nicholas and the coins and how stockings hanging from the fire and that type of thing. And so we went through that and she says, oh, That's cool. And so I said, but what happens is your family and the people that love you. You know, we'll share things with. you and they'll get you things. Some of these things are small. Some of these things are re gifts. Right. So it's not that there's always this expectation of these big extravagant gifts all the time. but it's this thing of them showing that they care. And so we in. And they're made sometimes. And so that it also leaves space for her to be able to be this kind of this Santa's. figure in her making stuff or having a gift that she's able to. Make a surprise for that morning. Cause we don't do secrets. That's another conversation, right? But w that she can make a surprise even for the adult folks in her life. And so that's more about the thing that we've tried to build. We do the same thing with our four year old. It's a lot tougher because she's very, she's literal. Leary literal. And so. I was really nervous because she did tell some kids in her class that Santa wasn't real. And I was like,

Colin:

I'm.

Yolanda:

Like, I'm going to get a note home. But she did tell them that St. Nick was real. And so I was like, okay, I can, I think I can deal with that mainly because there's this. Crossing of the two where oftentimes depending on who you are and your culture and the history of your family, some people refer to Santa as Saint Nick. And so I'm like, okay, we can gloss it over. And we can make it work in that way, but that's so that's what they do know exists. Was this real person named Saint Nick and that they get gifts from family members. for the holidays. And this way of If I'm a kind person year round, and I care about folks around me, then I can get gifts and that's still, and that goes into that morality thing that you were talking about, which is a whole other thing. Yeah.

Colin:

I'm curious. Then our gifts from St. Nick are gifts from mom and dad. and

Yolanda:

Oh, they're from us. Like I am not given credit. Test. Just some summary. You know, some other person that doesn't even exist. No, they're not getting the credit for this. I've worked too hard. Right. But So we'll put like from mom and dad, from Nana, from Grammy, from whoever. Right. So it has the folks' names on it. That's how it works. So

Colin:

we had a really interesting conversation over dinner. We, at Chris and I were talking through because our first placement or our first time with our kiddos, Or kiddos is going to be right around the holidays. This balance between. Where does the gifts come from? And is it overwhelming because of all the transition that's happening for the child? So it's funny. We, and. I'm hoping we do a conversation about. the foster process. At some point. But there's this period of time. Even if the state has decided that the biological family is no, no longer. able to be the caretaker for. Their child and they're in permanent custody. and going to be adopted from foster care. There's this window where Things could change. Right there. There's this window before permanent custody, where even if a kid has been with you for a year or two years, they could go back to their bio family. And usually the 12, 12 month mark is the marker. So we had a really interesting conversation last night around this Christmas, it might all come from Santa because we don't want it to be. Us providing all these gifts. And if you have to go back, then have this. Resentment towards the bio family or the next foster family or whatever the situation is. Because our homes. Is very open. and Welcoming to the idea of bringing a child in and then layering on top of it. There's also like we have no toys in the house like we do. There are some things we're going to have to do before Christmas. So. It was this really interesting cause I was going the other direction. I was thinking Stan does not always equitable to. Our kids' friends. So how are we going to navigate? The fact that, Hey, maybe Santa brings a ton of things for our kiddo this first year, Cause that's this big adjustment year. And then they go to school the next day. And Santa brought a friend. You know, the three or four things. that's brought five provided. To them because that's what the family could use at the time. And I'm just really conflicted on Santa and I don't know what I still, I don't know what I want to do. Because yeah. And I also. We're very fortunate. We're going to be able to do an awesome Christmas. But What if a friend gives something it's a book or something like that. And that's like a lot and it's coming from the very limited number of books in the home. And. This dynamic between a re gift or a homemade gift, or I don't know, I just, I'm very conflicted and I grew up in the Christmas house, so I'm not quite sure. How the navigate this one.

Yolanda:

That's a really, that's a tough one. And I think that kind of goes to. The space of. taking time to think about. Being thankful and appreciative. Of just all of the things. Right. And so, for us prior to. actually all of the big Christmas, Things that we do on Christmas day for us. We have a, we have dinner the night before. And so We actually have at my brother's house. Usually. And my brother and his husband's house. Now it's because I have young kids and his house was very nice. and a lot of breakable things. It's. It's now transit because they don't have any kids. And so now it's transitioned to my house because my house is childproof. And has. things for them to do all of the activities. So when we're done eating dinner and they want to run around, they can run a mock and they can play. But during that time is what we have conversations as a family. And so we're sitting together as a family and we're telling all of these stories and talking about the things that we appreciate. And so I think it's that space as well, where. It helps to build this space of appreciation, both of the small things. Because those are necessary. As well as being hugely appreciative of the larger things. That might come along and we do have conversations Because we often do have those conversations around inequities. And. How while one friend might have something that might not have been your favorite. So we talk about things where that's not my favorite. Instead of saying that they don't like it. It's just, it's not my favorite or it might not have been something that you might've asked for, but they are, if they're really appreciative. and be happy for them. and that's all it is being happy for them. It's And it's not a comparative thing. You're not comparing yourself to someone else. You're happy for what you have in your situation.

Colin:

When you decided to go the option of St. Nicholas and make. Honestly, for Christmas, this is a pretty sizable transition for a four and a seven year old compared to how most families are doing it. And actually I'm super curious. and I'm really enjoying these thoughts. I'm interested though, in if there was a trend, a generational transition, like did your family. Feel a certain kind of way because you. like Ruined the holiday traditions, or like, how did that then play out? Cause I'm thinking we did real big Christmas Eve with my mom's family. Growing up Christmas day was with my dad's family. We'd have my grandparents over in the morning for breakfast. Like those things would all say. State constant. But a lot of conversation around Santo, what Santa bring you, what'd you get? How did that go? And I'm pretty sure, like for a while, Santa would bring gifts to my grandparents' house and they would bring that over in the morning. There's tradition. That also goes with the holidays. That you almost have to depart from. Yeah. How have you navigated that? My mom's birthday is also on Christmas. There's a whole action. Yeah. Right. Right. So now I'm not trying to, I'm trying not to ruin a Christmas and a birthday at the same time. but.

Yolanda:

With me, my, my family notes. I will say this. So I'm the youngest. of all of my siblings. And so with me being the youngest, my kids are the youngest. And my whole family. so there aren't other young children. the same age as my. As my children are. And so. It's a gift and a curse. It's funny enough because I have great nieces and nephews that are the same age as my children because of the age gap between me and my siblings. Yeah. So, so there's that. So it's not as much, at least a ton of kids around where they might ruin it for them. My parents know that. If there's something that I really truly believe in. And I'm like, this is what I'm going to do for my kids, or this is what I'm going to do with, and in my situation. or am I, they. I don't want to say that. I'm difficult. But They know they're like, okay if this is what Yolanda says, this is what's going to go on And her situation. We will. respect that. Right. And so with my parents, they were very much okay, I get it. Not a problem. We won't ask you, ask the kids what Santa brought them. Also. My kids are very vocal in that. When my husband's mother now, cause she will ask them, oh, what. it's, What did Santa bring you And my seven year old totally corrected her and was like no Santa didn't bring that. It was fun and she's no Grammy. That's not how this works. First of all, it's his name is St. Nick. and mommy got me the Ester Nana. You know, and so she totally. Shut it down, But for her. she there's still. What I was really glad of. And I have, I don't, I can't take credit for it and I don't know how it happened, but even though we don't have the space of having to have Santa as this figure in Christmas, there's still a certain. Magic. Yeah around it. And I. there's nothing that I can take credit for that, that still exists. around it. But it does. And so I think it's that element of surprise, right. Yeah, that still exists in the, not knowing what you are going to get. And so we have conversations around. What are things that we no longer play with? And so we gather those things. We take those for other kids and we share them. By taking them to a shelter or taking them to a thrift store to a Goodwill or something like that. And so we make space. For new things. And then also w with, so there's that conversation of making space and sharing with other folks. And then the magic of knowing that something is coming, not knowing what it is. And so they have a short list knowing that not everything will on your list. And that's on purpose. Yeah. Even if I know sounds terrible. Even if I have the means to be able to get all of those things. I think there's also this space. Of Expectations that. Setting expectations in this way that we can ask for a ton of things and to be appreciative of the things that we do get, And it also lets me know for me, it's a list for later on in the year. for their Birthday. I'm like, oh, I already know what you want. and what you like. Right. So for me, it's this, I have them give me an hour. I'll have her. You know, we'll come up with a number. she's seven. So I would tell her to give me a list of seven things that are like your absolute favorites, right? And so we'll make that list and then we'll get a couple of things. And also it gives us space so that other folks who might be interested in purchasing things for her can do that as well. And so that there's not this overwhelmed, cause honestly there's only so many hours in the day. That a kid has to be able to play with all these toys. All of these things. Yeah.

Colin:

And if you look at play behaviors, and if you look at the way, like a Montessori program would run. Or. you talk to me about how we're going to set up our play spaces. If you intentionally rotate the toys you rotate the books because otherwise you're going to grab the same four things. You're going to one, get bored with it. Or to you as a parent, you're gonna be like, I cannot watch listen, read, play with. XYZ thing. One more time. And then there's also this component of, it's not then. Challenging anymore. So there's a component of play that is. something that we're learning from. So I, I love that idea of keep it small, keep it tight, rotate through. The donating of things that are no longer of use. I think there's also a lot of really cool. Boundary setting that also underlies the things that you're doing with expectation setting. I think it's something you could carry into adolescence, for example, around Hey, when you're in Your first relationship when you have a best friend, like you don't have to buy them that thing. It's to show that you care about that person. So there's a lot of cool things going on. And the household that I like around the holidays.

Yolanda:

Thank you. I just appreciate you putting it into a totally different context. I did it just because in my mind it made sense, but I don't think I ever thought of it. In that way of it. Setting into boundary setting. Right. Cause that's really important for us and even the transitioning of toys, it just, for us, it just naturally happens because they get tired of it. They're like, okay. And it ends up falling to the bottom of the toy. bin and then they forget about it. And then you have this You know that. Like the aisle of misfit toys, right. All of the things that you know and we've gotten a little bit to that point we have, a whole army of Barbie dolls. I call them the ball headed Barbies. They played with. them. They were really excited about them. When we First got them. They had cute outfits. They were fun, but it's okay, what's the next step in this thing? Oh, I'm going to give her a new haircut. Yeah. And then they got scissor happy. And now all of these Barbies have the worse. Yep. The worst haircuts. That's

Colin:

the shoe, maybe an arm.

Yolanda:

Oh, absolutely. Yes. So, and I think to be able to get around that is having less. because I was like, if they didn't have 20 Barbies, then he wouldn't be like, oh, I can. I can cut the hair off of half of these and I still have plenty. Then you have too many.

Colin:

Yeah, Right. We've. We chatted a bit about home. I want to transition to The double-edged sword, which is the next month. So December 1st through. New year's Eve, but particularly through the 24th Christmas Eve. In early childhood programs, particularly in preschool. because there are a lot of traditions even here at sprout five that have been. Inherited and established. When we love all of them. I don't know if my team fully knows yet, but we're actually doing away with Santa this year. So Santa is not coming. To town. I know, but there's a couple of reasons for it. And a lot of it actually has to do with the, this article from learning for justice that I. I stumbled into. I don't even know when thinking about Santa. I was trying to think about what was happening at home. And I was trying to think what are we going to do at that school? And then I realized, you know, our west side programs have a fairly large Jewish population and we are now not celebrating their entire winter holiday. where we're not talking about Hanukkah. We're not. And it's not intentional. It's just that. The and this article talks about the problem with the Christmas curriculum. Really is an early childhood. It's the end of the year, teachers are tired. You can't take them outside for as long as you used to You're no. 45 minutes to play in the playground is now whether restricted to 15 minutes or so you still go out, but it's two and a half hours to get hats and mittens on. Obviously I'm exaggerating. but it's. You know, it's a thing. Yeah. And honestly you just get the holiday fatigue. Yeah. it's easy to do. Rudolph the Red-Nosed reindeer and jingle bells and do Christmas trees one day and reaps the other. And what this article talks about is not the. You know, it's not killing Christmas, but it's these like unintended consequences. Of this. Hyper Chris Mathai's December. In early childhood programs and what it's actually been doing for children developmentally. that I've never actually thought about despite the fact that I used to teach. Child development and spend a lot of time talking about morality. So even at the very beginning, we've touched on a little bit, but this idea of. good and bad. And how. Because of we know family economic situations and what families can and can't afford. What one friend will get when they've been good. It's very different than what another friend's going to get when they're good. And then also then the perceptions of good and bad. If you, if your kiddo is going to school and they're, You know, getting their hair yanked by a friend because you're too, and that's what two year olds do where you have a nibbler and you're working on. not biting and everything else. That's. Quote, unquote, bad behavior. That's, it's not nice to hit your friends. We can't hit our friends. But then now gifts are here. There's this whole level of morality. And there are stages of morality and this idea. of like good boy, good girl, bad boy. Bad girl is actually a stage of. Morality. There's just a lot there that I've never thought about. And I have become conflicted with it. And I don't know how much has a parent, the concept of the naughty and nice list has come in to play. You know, you've deviated a little bit from the traditional Santa's approach, but knowing from our conversations, how you like to parent. Yeah, I'm curious how the. person, this good verse bad sits with some of the other ways that you parent and teach.

Yolanda:

So we, for us in our house, we don't do good and bad. Because it doesn't address whatever the actual action was. that makes us as adults think something was good or bad. Yeah. So I, we talk about how it's not kind to hit. Because it's, when you have more than one kid, there's there. They're going to fight right. That's just what happens. They have Different personalities. They have different ways of approaching things. It happens. And so

Colin:

we'll in, particularly with boys, like rough and tumble play, particularly around three and four is actually quite good. It helps set boundaries like. Developmentally. Girls Pick up on a little bit sooner than boys do. And it's you know, and I encourage girls. You know, you're going to it's. It's. It's natural development for a child. to, we have to coach around it and Yeah, It's not nice and everything else, but yeah, they're going to smack each other. It's going to happen. Yeah. It's going to happen. Right. Totally going

Yolanda:

to happen where. going through that right now with our four year old. And our puppy. chief wants to do that with our puppy, which. We had our other. dog was older and. put up without She tolerated. A lot more because she was old and whatever. put me in a headlock. You know,

Colin:

Do the

Yolanda:

do the thing, whatever. And this new puppy is like what? And she's gotten a little bit more used to it and she'll, she will nibble not actually bite. My child, but like nibble in play until now my four year old understands that's play and she's okay with it. And so She actually sometimes will put her hand. in the dog's mouth and let the dog nipple in her fingers because it doesn't hurt her anymore. Because she understands about that's the whole boundary setting thing, but we definitely don't do the good and bad thing. And that's something that. I'd struggle a little bit with. The caretakers because we have a multi-generational. multi-generational household. Because I've shared it before. And so my mom lives with us and my mom is a boomer. She is she straight up. a boomer. And and as my husband's mother now, she doesn't live with us, but she is more. Way more traditional and a lot of aspects. Then my mother is, my mom is if I set a boundary and I say, this is how I want to raise my kids also because she lives in the house she's okay, I'll respect that. Yeah. She slips up every once in a while because we're human. And so sometimes she's you're being bad and I'm like, mom, what does that even mean? Right. What does that mean? And then social then she'll address the actual action or what was the thing that they did? And so at least there's that, but his mom does that all the time. Where she's they. Have you been being good or have you been being bad? Sam does not And I'm like, stop it. It makes me. It makes me cringe, honestly, because. And mainly because I've tried to. And this is also a part of boundary setting because it's difficult, even as an adult. to still set boundaries. Right. And have those kinds of conversations with her. And so what I leave it up to is for the kids. To allow them, if it, because of they know how we are in our own household and that's where they're spending most of their time. And so even if they are having some of these small interactions that are outside of the household that are, that don't fall necessarily within the norm that we have in our own household. I have to, I find myself in this space of picking my battles. Right. And okay. If I continue to poke at her every time she says this, is that going to ruin the relationship that she and I have. Right, right. As. You know, her being my mother-in-law or my mom. Right. Like I call her my mom. And so also, so is that going to, to ruin that relationship over this interaction that my kids know for sure when they come home and other spaces outside of this space, With their reality is and how we as a family, as a more nuclear family. Yeah. View the world. And when I say nuclear family, it's not necessarily. It's just a PA parent kids, right. But folks who live in the household. So I don't want that to be misconstrued where it has to be like a mom and a dad and two kids or anything. It's just the folks who live in that household kind of thing, but how we are in our household, they know that. And so I'm like, I. I'll let them answer her. And so sometimes it depends on the mood that they're in because sometimes they give her side eye and they're like, Grammy. You know that Santa is not real. Yeah. right. And then they'll go on. or or they'll explain the actual actions. You know, And it's in this kind of really interesting way where these little kids are schooling her, right? Like they're teaching her. The expectations that they have. And so there, and it's in this way, it's also allowing them to set the boundaries because honestly, while it might bother me as the parent. Does it bother them? and if it doesn't bother them, Like on certain things I have to let it go and let it be because it's now that's me pushing my thoughts. and ideas on these little people. And they have whole brains while not fully functioning and fully grown, but they still have their own ideas of how they want to interact and do certain things. And so I'm going to let them do it. And so I allow them to respond. I'll ask them, I'm like what do you say. And then they get to respond and tell them how, sh how they feel about what she said.

Colin:

Yeah. Actually. Tracks on quite nicely with what. The this article is talking about. And it says, and I think. Teachers can be swapped out for parents. When looking over this, but a teacher's role particularly in this concept of good and bad. Behavior and guiding children. Teachers help children develop a sense of moral autonomy. When they discuss the consequences of undesirable behaviors with other children. Involve them in possible as much as possible when determining class, your rules and consequences. for those unintended behaviors. And to regularly link limits with conversations of unstable reason. For such limits. So the academic jargon, taking that all out, essentially parents and teachers, what we really should be doing instead of, particularly for two months of the year, going really heavy on this good versus bad and what that means and what that is, and creating these abstract. Honestly, all we're doing. When you tell a kid they're being good or they're being bad. Is trying to push this idea of pleasing an adult. So whether it's pleasing a parent pleasing a teacher, or in this sense, pleasing Santa, it's not actually. Teaching any of these boundaries around why we want children to, or not do certain things and why we want them to learn the consequences of behaviors and why consequences exists and why do we have rules? And. You know, sometimes rules are there to help us. Sometimes rules are there to keep people safe. Sometimes rules are meant to be broken, and that's a whole conversation that. As kids get older. We should have. But if you're putting these hard and fast perimeters around good and bad, that's really difficult to do. You have to unlink a lot of behaviors. And then some of the other things from your article that I just want to get the parent perspective on. Cause I thought they were interesting. And I would actually encourage from an early childhood standpoint. Like classroom wise, but I'm interested on the parents side. Keep Christmas activities, but limit them to two to three days and making them as close to the holiday as possible. So now you're having a celebration of the holiday, which then gives you the opportunity to think about the other holidays that are in your community around the winter months as well. And maybe you're not spending two or three days on it, but maybe you're doing a day for Hanukkah and a day for Kwanzaa. And some of the other winter traditions that are more cultural instead of actually being holidays themselves. I really liked that. I think there's some cool ways to incorporate. Like books and photos and other manipulates food would be another really cool thing to tie in. You've mentioned this already, but emphasize the aspect of giving in the holiday season rather than receiving. And the ways that you can incorporate children into the gift giving process and how we don't have to assert associate. A monetary value to a gift. And I think there's a level for parents of. Coaching we have to do for ourselves and our partners around when you then get a gift from a child, how do you respond and react to it? And I think it's this. Balance of you, obviously don't want to. Foo it and Push off to the side and. be like, oh, you know, Thanks. But you also, I don't think, want to be. Overexuberant about it either because it creates. Something like, what if. You can appreciate it, but you don't have to like,

Yolanda:

Essentially it goes back into the space. of lying to your child, right? To be quite candid.

Colin:

Yeah. Yeah.

Yolanda:

It's you lying to. Oh, my God, this is amazing.

Colin:

Right.

Yolanda:

Don't lie to your kid, right?

Colin:

Yeah. You put So much effort into that's the redirect, like to the better where the project. I appreciate all the effort that he into this, you must have had so much fun working on this. Where should we put this in the house and having it be that kind of situation I appreciate. And then making sure that you, as an adult are aware of what you're putting into the celebration. So why is it that we are celebrating? How do we want that to look? How do we cast that net as wide as we can? But also make sure we're not tying in all these unintended consequences. And aspects that as adults we can decipher through, but as a three-year-old, it's hard. Yeah, right. We're throwing a lot at them in December. I don't know. I don't know if I have any. I don't know if I've actually fixed. My Santo is, but. As always, I appreciate when we chat, I think there is a ton of really awesome things that you're doing around the holidays with your girls. I think there's. So much still to unpack and learn and so many cool ways you could create family traditions. and memories around it. But I think to put a bow. Ha unintended holidays. On the conversation that happened at my house. Last night. It's this idea that You're going to mess it up either way. And it's all about how you want to create something that works for your family, or if you're a teacher that works for your classroom. And celebrates the littles that you have in that space and the memories that you're creating with them. And I think that's. What's important for the magic of the holidays that you even said, like it's still there with the absence of. Santa and the traditional sense like that holiday magic is still there.

Yolanda:

I think it is

Colin:

it's our job to create that. for our kiddos. Absolutely. That's All right, Yolanda. have a great holiday.

Yolanda:

Thanks. You do the same and

Colin:

I hope you all do as well. Thank you for joining another episode of circle time. We hope that our discussion it made the first five years. Just a little bit easier. Be sure to check the show notes for additional tips and tricks and subscribe to circle time on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Circle Time is a product of SproutFive, a nonprofit that since 1922 has been working to reimagine early education. You can learn more about our work and our mission at sproutfive.org. We can't wait to see you in the next episode.